Web deductions.

1) If you can touch it and you can see it, it's REAL.

2) If you can touch it and you can't see it, it's TRANSPARENT.

3) If you can't touch it but you can see it, it's VIRTUAL.

4) If you can't touch it and you can't see it, it's GONE.

When different languages make it impossible to communicate…

Once a programmer drowned in the sea. Many Marines where at that time on the beach, but the programmer was shouting "F1, F1" and nobody understood it.

Be careful with smoke…

The boy is smoking and leaving smoke rings into the air. The girl gets irritated with the smoke and says to her lover: "Can't you see the warning written on the cigarette packet, smoking is injurious to health"!

The boy replies back: "Darling, I am a programmer. We don't worry about warnings, we only worry about errors".

Flat tyre!

A project manager, a computer programmer and a computer operator are driving down the road when the car they are in gets a flat tyre. The three men try to solve the problem.

The project manager: "Let's catch a cab and in ten minutes we'll reach our destination."

The computer programmer said: "We have here the driver's guide. I can easily replace the flat tyre and continue our drive."

The computer operator said: "First of all, let's turn off the engine and turn it on again. Maybe it will fix the problem."

Suddenly, a Microsoft software engineer passed by and said: "Try to close all windows, get off the car, and then get in and try again."